Broo Premium Lager


Company info:
Broo Pty Ltd
Sorrento, V.I.C

[www.broo.com.au]

Bottle size sampled: 330 mL

Alcohol: 4.6%
Standard drinks: 1.2

Cap type: Twist

Cost: I picked this up for $2.99AU

Label info: ‘Premium Australian Lager. Brewed in our back shed and crafted from the finest malt, barley and of course hops. There’s no artificial anything, and it tastes bloody broodiful’
and
‘Broo Fact: A good Broo should always be drunk from a brown bottle. (Troo)’

What the label really means: haha…see what they did there? They said ‘broodiful’ instead of ‘beautiful’! haha.
Ok, all facetious laughter aside I gotta give the guys some credit for clearly having a sense of humour and wanting to make their label a fun read. I’m sure it would appeal to many different people in the community – ‘Hey Hey it’s Saturday’ fans for one!

The Hell-Cat review starts here

Label: They’ve taken the oft-used ‘kangaroos ahead’ road sign and given it a slight twist by having half of it in a shade of bronzed gold. It’s certainly an improvement as it steers just a tad clear of cliched-ism. The gold used on the label is not your traditional beer label gold and also serves to steer the beer away from real-estate agent tacky. The R in ‘Broo’ bears a striking resemblance to a kangaroo tail and is cute in a ‘Look at that elderly person carrying a walkman’ kind of way. But, over all, the label fails miserably. It’s still well and truly entrenched in the highway gift shop genre and there’s little to help it claw its way out.

I give it a label rating of 4.5 out of 10.

AROMA: It’s very….wait for it….hoppy. There. Done. It’s good night from me.

Taste: GLASS – Quite a bland, generic lager and not overly enjoyable in the least. In fact the more I drink of this the more bland it becomes. It has all the markings of a big-mass produced brew while purporting to be made in the back shed. I’m not buying it for a second but if I did, I’d suggest someone check the guttering and the hop bag for mouse turds.

I give it a beer from glass rating of 5 out of 10.

Taste: BOTTLE –
Just as dull, if not more so. Oh boy…this is really quite embarrassing. I bet the bloke that sold me this bottle this afternoon was having a quiet chuckle to himself. Well the joke’s on him because….oh wait…no, the joke is on me isn’t it? Keep forgetting who benefits in jokes of this nature. You know, the ol consumer watchdog scares and such.

I give it a taste from bottle rating of 5 out of 10.

Song of choice: Try this along side Led Zeppelin’s ‘Over the Hills and Far Away

Accompanying food: It’s not a beer I recommend to accompany much food as I fear you might revisit a lot of dinner after 2-3 of these Broos. But if I did have to recommend food I’d say big, fatty sausages, steak, onions, mushrooms and char-grilled vegies.

Best season to appreciate: Which is the season that means never? Alright, alright….I’ll play fair. Summer. Done.

All-nighter beer? Nope. No way. Not now. Not ever.

NEXT WEEK: It’s my 99th beer next week, leading up to the great celebrations planed for the 100th! Give me your suggestions, or, if you’re reading this from a brewery with a few spare bottles, well….*wink*….you know….*wink*. 

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Comments
  1. Kai says:

    You’ll hear much more about Broo as things go along. Don’t mind a Coopers and many other fine boutique Aussie beers. Have done alot of travel to Asia and always love a Tiger beer in a frozen glass when it’s 35 degrees and bloody humid in Malaysia 🙂 I enjoy your site mate, top effort!!

    Like

  2. Kai says:

    Well if the figures stand up Radio and it’s all friends of friends of friends, then Broo must have alot of friends 🙂 I believe ther just trying to do the right thing and it’s not just about beer guys. Australia will become like the rest of the world if we don’t think about our generations to come. Gotta Love this country!!

    Like

    • Mason Hell-Cat says:

      How do you mean ‘it’s not just about the beer’?

      Anyway, welcome aboard Kai – hope you stick around and join in some of the other beer discussions at the site that is totally ‘just about the beer’.
      What other beer do you like besides Broo Premium?

      Cheers,
      Mason.

      Like

  3. Kai says:

    I hear they sold 3,000,000 stubbies in the last 2 months, must be doing something right, Bloody Broodiful I say!!!!

    Like

    • Mason Hell-Cat says:

      Quality over quantity I always say, Kai.

      Like

    • Radio Snivins says:

      Yes, I heard about their three mill sales as well. Having tasted the stuff I was dubious, so I did some industrial espionage to verify the numbers – they stand up – and then some independent market research to find out why. Using my findings and a fractal based extrapolation equation I determined that it was readers, and friends of readers, and friends of friends of readers etc. of this blog test guzzling Broo. So, in conclusion, it’s a rickety stat to verify popularity. Repeat sales, now there’s a stat so solid you could hang Michael Hutchence, Keith Carradine, and the blonde guy from Die Hard on it. None out of ten.

      Like

  4. It’s a truly awful beer isn’t it? More offensive is that they bang on about taking on the big boys of brewing and providing the drinkers of Australia with a quality alternative.

    Just terrible.

    Like

    • Mason Hell-Cat says:

      You are so damned right, Leon. I get shudders just thinking back on this brew. I will not be returning any time soon.

      Like

  5. Radio Snivins says:

    Accurate review, Hellakazoo. Broo is rotten stuff. It looks like beer, but it tastes like gaseous barium meal. It is fortuitious though. I test guzzled six while cruising hard rubbish piles last night and when I pulled the van over to huck in the gutter I found a pair of foozling boots. I had been using hollowed out loaves of day old bread. Not anymore. Nine out of ten.

    Like

    • BargeDave says:

      Well I definitely don’t need to sample this now that I’ve read Sniv’s comments as well as Mase’s review. Thanks guys, you’ve saved me making a poor investment.

      Like

      • Radio Snivins says:

        Hellakazoo prob’ly gets it all the time, but yours is the first documented case of anyone ever heeding my advice, Bargé. Thanks for introducing me to a genuinely new experience. Nine out of ten.

        Like

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